Author Topic: Bad Paranoia  (Read 100 times)

criette

Bad Paranoia
« on: April 05, 2017, 03:42:53 AM »
I have been recently having REALLY bad paranoia over crazy stuff and I feel like a maniac typing this but I have been having these scary thoughts of someone cutting my legs off or my arms or my hair or really any part of me. I have no idea why my brain likes to think of that, but it is. I know it is not going to happen but it just keeps popping up and I am so sick and tired of thinking about it.

I have also been having really bad conspiracy, devil thoughts. Like one day I was watching a video or music being played backwards that had creepy messages behind it when it was reversed and the majority of them were about Satan and the devil and just really bad stuff that has gotten to my head. There is this one message that keeps replaying in my head over and over and over again that I lose my focus in school sometimes. School is bad, but not as bad as going to sleep. My eyes won't close, I am too scared to close them cause I feel like the second I open them, some figure or face is just gonna pop up right in front of me. Or sometimes I feel like something is creeping up behind me and I feel like I am loosing my mind. I also keep thinking about me dying in my sleep. I know it happens to some people and I am really scared it will happen to me or my loved ones so I have to count my blessings LITERALLY EVERY DAY cause I am just so scared that this will happen. And I bet people my age (16) don't even think about this!!!! So I don't know if I have a problem or what but does anyone else think of this or is it just me?

And maybe some people will recommend me seeing someone to get help but I can't tell my parents that! They will think that I am crazy and send me to some Bible Camp or something. I just really need to clear my head. Any advice would help :)

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Re: Bad Paranoia
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2017, 09:08:46 AM »
I have been recently having REALLY bad paranoia over crazy stuff and I feel like a maniac typing this but I have been having these scary thoughts of someone cutting my legs off or my arms or my hair or really any part of me. I have no idea why my brain likes to think of that, but it is. I know it is not going to happen but it just keeps popping up and I am so sick and tired of thinking about it.

I have also been having really bad conspiracy, devil thoughts. Like one day I was watching a video or music being played backwards that had creepy messages behind it when it was reversed and the majority of them were about Satan and the devil and just really bad stuff that has gotten to my head. There is this one message that keeps replaying in my head over and over and over again that I lose my focus in school sometimes. School is bad, but not as bad as going to sleep. My eyes won't close, I am too scared to close them cause I feel like the second I open them, some figure or face is just gonna pop up right in front of me. Or sometimes I feel like something is creeping up behind me and I feel like I am loosing my mind. I also keep thinking about me dying in my sleep. I know it happens to some people and I am really scared it will happen to me or my loved ones so I have to count my blessings LITERALLY EVERY DAY cause I am just so scared that this will happen. And I bet people my age (16) don't even think about this!!!! So I don't know if I have a problem or what but does anyone else think of this or is it just me?

And maybe some people will recommend me seeing someone to get help but I can't tell my parents that! They will think that I am crazy and send me to some Bible Camp or something. I just really need to clear my head. Any advice would help :)

If you feel you can't go to your parents, perhaps you could try speaking to a teacher you trust or your school nurse. You should try to see a doctor about this.

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Re: Bad Paranoia
« Reply #2 on: April 05, 2017, 10:11:50 AM »
I had obsessive thoughts like these about your age, and well into adulthood.  There's something called OCD---obsessive-compulsive disorder.  Maybe you have that.  Mindfulness, just being aware that they're just intrusive thoughts, can be helpful.  Type in "intrusive thoughts" and "OCD" on YouTube and I'm sure there'll be a lot of people with their own experiences and ways they cope with it.  Good luck.