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Author Topic: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3  (Read 431 times)

rayayala17

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Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« on: February 19, 2013, 11:51:08 AM »
Pedro eventually communicated with me again on MySpace but we still had problems. He messaged me on MySpace again telling me to give him more money. I don't remember what happened after that but he asked me again if I'll lend him money. I told him to give me back the money I lent him before and I won't announce on MySpace about the sexual act I performed on him. I don't remember what he said but I posted on my status how he made that money off me. He told to me to meet him at the high school and to bring the money.

At the high school I gave him another $120. He asked me why I posted that on MySpace, that his friends wanted to beat me up but he told them no because I was just mad when I posted it. He told me he could beat me up right then and there if he wanted to. We ended up making peace, and chatted a bit. I told him I was thinking about inviting him to hang out on my upcoming birthday, but I was afraid he would tell me no. He told me it wasn't going to happen, anyway. He also told me that if I didn't bother him he would let me hang out with his friends at their next party. I was a bit offended and I told him I didn't like his friends.

The day before my birthday, I messaged him and he didn't respond. There where times when he would read my messages without answering them. I cussed him out in another message. He responded back saying he was going to hang out with me but instead changed his mind. I told him that he wasn't going to go through with it, anyway. He told me I don't know that. He also said that I got to show him that I won't get mad if he doesn't respond to me and then he'll celebrate my birthday with me. I left him alone after.

My birthday finally came. I had high hopes for it. People had posted happy birthday comments on my profile, including Pedro. I deleted his because he was always deleting my comments. I spent the whole morning cleaning up the apartment. I was hoping he'll meet me around noon and then end the day around midnight. I sent him a message asking if he was gonna hang out with me. Hours went by and my message was unread. I got to work baking my chocolate birthday cake with cream cheese frosting. I started having doubts about Pedro. The whole day started turning into a disaster. My mom got mad because the pasta shells I had boiled were a bit over cooked and they were too hot for her to touch. My mom stormed off. I felt so low.

I gave up on Pedro. Later that evening, between 7:00 and 8:00 I received a message from Pedro saying he was working all day and was going to bed. But he'll be sure to get me Pokemon cards for my present. After asking him he wanted to spend whatever time was left with me he said he just wanted to relax. This angered me because I felt he just didn't want to be seen in public with me. While he was offline I posted a comment on his status demanding my money back and not to forget about to tell his friends how he made money off me.

I went to bed crying. About an hour later he messaged me telling me to meet at the high school. I told him I wanted to discuss that horrible day. I ended up meeting him out my front door. He invited me into his car and asked me what my problem was. I started crying and told him everything that went wrong and how I felt. He said he finally understood; that he realized that all I really want was at least one friend. He swore he was at work. We made up and agreed to start fresh. He said from now on he would help me out as a friend. I gave him a slice of my birthdy cake.

Pt. 4 coming

jeremiah

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #1 on: February 19, 2013, 09:05:29 PM »
I don't know how much this Pedro is a malignant narcissist and emotional sadist or a repressed bi- or homosexual with his own inner conflicts.  His half-threat that he could beat you up makes him sound dangerous.

I don't know how much you even recognize the toxicity of your relationship with and desire for him or even want to get out of it and help yourself.  I'm sorry to be blunt, but your self-esteem seems pretty low for you to keep being strung along and toyed with by this obviously sick individual.  You almost sound like an abuse-junkie.

I don't know if you're just a shallow drama addict that can't even understand a better, healthier self-image, or you really want to change, to improve.  I really think you need to get some depth, some character, some self-respect, some self-knowledge.

Look up Sam Vaknin (about malignant narcissists), sociopathy, ASPD, low self-esteem, drama addiction, etc.  Get some books on these, delve into them, and "deep read" them.  Don't just skip/spot read some stupid "websites" on the computer screen.

You might get some more feedback/help on www.psychforums.com, if that's what you're actually looking for, and not just writing puff articles for "True Confessions" or something.

Sorry if this seems harsh, but sometimes you've got to be cruel to be kind.

The_Lightbringer

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #2 on: February 19, 2013, 10:16:46 PM »
I don't smurfing get it ...   :embarrassed:

-Auron are you crying too ?
-No ....i am just........fading away.......

emussel

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #3 on: February 20, 2013, 12:16:43 AM »
Why do you keep giving him money???

LiB

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #4 on: February 20, 2013, 12:34:27 AM »
Sigh. :undecided:

emussel

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #5 on: February 20, 2013, 03:52:44 AM »
I tried to create an account on the psychforums thing and it said that my email address was already in use. I already have an account on there! But I don't remember my username so I can't access it or create a new account. I don't remember creating an account there but I must have years ago when I was obsessed with searching for answers to what was wrong with myself. And that was well before I legitimately went crazy. That sucks because I could probably help a lot of people on there, I know a ton about mental health from first hand experience and have a lot to offer people. Oh well. I read one post about people having 'false memories' which is the first I've heard of other people having them besides me. Even though theirs were very mundane compared to my extraordinary lifetime of imagined memories. These days I'm just content to be perfectly sane again and not worried in the slightest about whats "wrong with me".

rayayala17

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #6 on: February 20, 2013, 09:42:07 PM »
Why do you keep giving him money???
The 1st time I was trying to show him I could be a good friend. The 2nd time I just wanted sex from him  and the 3rd time I told him to steal his pairs of his friends underwear.

emussel

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #7 on: February 20, 2013, 11:10:58 PM »
1.Don't buy you're friends

2.never pay for sex

and I don't even want to know about the underwear thing... :undecided:

rayayala17

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #8 on: February 24, 2013, 10:59:40 AM »
I don't know how much this Pedro is a malignant narcissist and emotional sadist or a repressed bi- or homosexual with his own inner conflicts.  His half-threat that he could beat you up makes him sound dangerous.

I don't know how much you even recognize the toxicity of your relationship with and desire for him or even want to get out of it and help yourself.  I'm sorry to be blunt, but your self-esteem seems pretty low for you to keep being strung along and toyed with by this obviously sick individual.  You almost sound like an abuse-junkie.

I don't know if you're just a shallow drama addict that can't even understand a better, healthier self-image, or you really want to change, to improve.  I really think you need to get some depth, some character, some self-respect, some self-knowledge.

Look up Sam Vaknin (about malignant narcissists), sociopathy, ASPD, low self-esteem, drama addiction, etc.  Get some books on these, delve into them, and "deep read" them.  Don't just skip/spot read some stupid "websites" on the computer screen.

You might get some more feedback/help on www.psychforums.com, if that's what you're actually looking for, and not just writing puff articles for "True Confessions" or something.

Sorry if this seems harsh, but sometimes you've got to be cruel to be kind.
Sorry. I'll think twice before sharing stories from my past on a "puff article" website...

jeremiah

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #9 on: February 24, 2013, 10:08:52 PM »
ray,

Again, I'm sorry if I seemed blunt, but you asked for advice and I thought honesty in this case was the best policy.  You're actions seemed pretty self-destructive.  Short answer to your question, no, he wasn't a friend at all and never will be.

As you can see from my profile I'm "old" and not just chronologically, but culturally.  I didn't get on the Net til I was 43.  People your age probably don't notice it, but the Net isn't just a medium, but a culture.  One aspect is people getting on and telling stories and clueless old people like me never know who's real and who isn't and who's really seeking help and who's just playing jokes.

If it's helpful for you to post these accounts, by all means do so, but all the details in the world aren't going to change the main fact that Pedro's a cruel, sick, exploitive person.

Sometimes problems have to be discussed frankly if they're ever going to get solved. 

rayayala17

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #10 on: February 24, 2013, 11:38:24 PM »
I'm actually getting to that in part 4 where you answer that but I also ask another question. His friends don't understand that he was always approaching ME and he made it look like I was stalking him. I thought I'd give as much detail as I can remember so users can weight the results themselves.

rayayala17

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #11 on: April 20, 2019, 03:53:30 AM »
Hi, Jeremiah. I want to thank you for your honesty. The past couple years I've reflected on myself and have learned to stop feeling sorry for myself. These days, when I fall into a slump I get back up and keep going.

jeremiah

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #12 on: April 20, 2019, 10:19:11 AM »
You're welcome Ray.  Life's a learning process.

rayayala17

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #13 on: April 21, 2019, 05:52:32 AM »
I want to apologize for the way I'd treated you. I look back on it now and realize that it was because I couldn't handle criticism/the truth. Now that I'm almost 30, lately I listen to younger people's problems and I give them a brutal dose of honesty and give advice on what they can do to change it.

jeremiah

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Re: Was He Really A Friend? pt. 3
« Reply #14 on: April 22, 2019, 07:03:12 AM »
That's okay Ray.  I have a pretty thick skin anyway.  I also have a short fuse some times and I'll spout off.  I'm no saint.  Maybe our cranky old advice will sink in a little and help some people, even if they don't like it at the moment.